First of all, it's just a song and not all of it really applies, but it certainly described my feelings at the time. Also, if you have ever heard the song, it's got some attitude and that's something I need right now.
Oh you know I did it
It's over and I feel fine
Nothing you could say is gonna change my mind
Waiting and I wait at the longest night
Nothing like the taste to sweet decline
I was down, I fell, I fell so fast
Dropping like the grains in an hourglass
Never say forever cause nothing last
Dancing with the thorns of my buried past
For me, this song is about moving on and moving on involves, first...moving. Going from one place to the next...a change. If there were ever a time that someone could "change my mind", that time is closing. Not because my mind is closing, very much the opposite, because it's opening! Because I have opened my mind to new things I see things differently and I can't look at them the old way anymore. Once I watch a movie at the theater, I can't stand to watch the "TV Version" of it because I know there's something missing. Besides, why would you care now, after all this time after I waited for you to question me before? ("Nothing like the taste to sweet decline"). Where did my "friends" go?
Yes, I fell and fast, but now God has picked me back up and instead of avoiding the past I am looking it over and realizing it was just part of the journey ("dancing with the thorns of my buried past").
Nevermind there's nothing I can do
Bet your life there's something killing you...
...Take a good hard look for the very last time
The very last one in a very long line
Only took a second to say goodbye
Then the pleasure 'bout the pleasure's
been mine, all mine
OK, this is a dig. But, I feel like I deserve to give out just one very subtle parting shot. This is after getting a call from someone from my past wanting to clear their conscience so they can feel better about themselves ("Bet your life there's something killing you"). No concern about how me and my family are doing, just concern for personal demons. The pleasure is mine and I love where God has guided me, I pray that I will always follow him...he has never let me down.
OK, there it is. Yes, it was a"moment of angst", what can I say?